Gossip and Underwear

A bad thing happened to me in second grade, which like the Sunday School incident, I have been unable to forget.

There was this very strange girl in our class named Briana. I was always nice to Briana, because, while strange, she wasn't mean or anything. She liked me well enough and we got along decently. We weren't best friends, but we'd say hi if we saw each other in Walmart.

Well, one day, Briana's strangeness must have overwhelmed her.

The class poured out onto the playground for what appeared to be a normal recess period. But then kids started accumulating under the bridge. The bridge was this typical playground structure, composed to where there were holes in it and you could see through it. By natural curiosity, I joined the ever-growing group.

They were all staring at Briana, who was standing innocently on the bridge. In a skirt. With no underwear on.

Being about seven years old, everybody had a good giggle, then ran off to tell their friends. I shall note here that I did not go off and tell anyone. I found it more embarrassing than hilarious, and just went off to swing or what have you and thought nothing more of it.

We came back to the classroom and quickly noticed that Briana was missing and the teacher was staring at us with those stern "you did something wrong" eyes. We all nervously awaited our punishment.

She began lecturing us on the hurtful nature of gossip, and slowly we pieced together that the news of Briana's bare butt had spread quickly throughout the playground and eventually made it to the teacher's bench. Briana was off somewhere crying, and being given proper undergarments.

The teacher then took it upon herself to locate the perpetrator of this vicious "rumor." (I put rumor in quotes because it most obviously and glaringly true.) She chose the child that she apparently heard it from and asked him where he'd heard it, tracing it back through the rows of desks, until somebody provided my name. This somebody was my best friend Erica.

After Erica's accusation, the teacher was staring at me, asking where I'd heard it from. This was quite the predicament, considering I certainly hadn't told Erica, and nobody had told me. I just saw for myself, as most of the kids in the class had. It had been an incriminating line of lies. A line that I felt should stop, not being able to falsely accuse anybody. I simply sat there and received a lecture on why gossiping was bad. The teacher must've suspected what had happened a little because I received no further punishments.

I don't think Briana ever found out that I was pinned for the alleged crime, and I had many strange and sometimes regrettable encounters with her in the future, but she was wearing underwear throughout all of them, and I didn't tell a soul.